:(

next week's due assignments.. plus JIS this monday. and discussion tomorrow morning for Maths and then 2.30 lagi for another coursework. heavy lagi tuuu the percentage. 100% pun ada. im just happy im on track, even tho its barely. God give me strength. Amin.

so tired. so much work. so many assignments. exams are drawing close. do u think i can do it? with all thts going ard??? so much holding up so much pain. i wanna be with my family. spend more time. ani work,work, work. i mean, is work, work, work really worth the precious time we could have used for loved ones?

tick, tock, tick. tock.

ah. i know i'll regret if i dont try my best. oh well. i'll be free after exams, anyway. cant give up. gotta go on. gotta be strong. life needs strength and determination. tawakal. dont waste time. dont let distractions and disheartening thoughts get to you. Focus, focus.

Salam~

finally stable.

hi hi Salam. i have been tryin to sleep but cant so i figure i'd just blog a while and then go to sleep. i have been struggling still this semester, but i finally feel more stable in terms of school work and the upcomin exams (ok, maybe im SO NOT ready for exams) but at least i feel like i have some control and direction of my course. its important tht u line these things out so tht ur objectives are clearer and the logistics of it is more obvious. doing work takes focus and consistency. once u get the hang of it, it gets simpler n u gain more confidence as well as experience. whatever u do, hold on and dont give up. keep trying n motivate urself. we can do it!!! focus!!! :)

speaking of focus, look at this table i had someone make hehehe. special thnks to ohana for recommending the dude. :D i kinda duplicate those tables from library cos i can sooo focus with this table. seriously!! like i can be on task for hours and feel geeky (in a good way:) and smart. its small but i like it this way. guess "learning styles" do matter. plug in my iPod n im good to go!

im very karit with myself, hahaha but i splurge when its necessary to education. this costs $300. pffft. so tht means i have to save more this coming month, but oh well hope it'll be a good investment. the shelves at the side is cos i get lazy if my books are jauh. this table is now in my room next to my book cabinet.

xx

anyhoo. i went to this reptile exhibition with n-bun and g-bun. we sent off my in laws n like, we had some other stuffs planned tht day so we went straight to the exhibition in ubd. there were many types of snakes and monitos lizrds. one like reall bigggg. like the head sama like a human adult's. and panjang. like i try to life it but heavy. n-bun kissed it tho!! like ahahaha. she was petting it as if it was a cat. ah bless her. i was real happy g-bun bawa kami sana. thanks hubby. the only problem was, nbun nda takut the snakes. she loved them BUT shes real shy with the ppl. kan she pemalu. so yeah. this is me with a tiny cutey snake (AND nbun!) wrapped ard my hand (and foot respectively, haha). so cute the tongue this one, i wntd to bring it home as a pet!!! huhuhu but gbun said no. and i know my mummy wud say no jua!! ;p and my dad, omggg. hahaha.

anyhoo. tmrw i puasa again. i guess kan menyimpati (sp?) syawal. so yeah. one of our sungkais, gbun brought me to escapade yumz. and i took this pic, cos its significant to us=D i guess only very few wud get it.

lap you

tadi i went for cadet training. it was siuk-er than usual. like, i thot it was more stable jua.. guess once u gt the hang of it, it isnt too bad. hehe. i kana balut tadi. ahaha by my buddy. cool huh? this is called the donut bandage, i think? FIRST AID is real useful. try to get knowledge-equipped on this when uve the time.

looking forward to finishing off all my assignments n focus on my exams. mudahan nda drop this semester :( oh well, whtever it is, redha. i really did try my best so im happy anyhow(but i'd be happier if i score high, AMin Amin!!! farfetched but doa doa!!)

muxch love =) -assalamualaikum-

email.

I'm not big on forwardedmsgs. the reasons i dont forward them most of the time is bcos i dunno the kesahihan (? haha) or the confirmation of how true it is. sometimes when an email says say this this this, cos its a surah from the Al-Qur'an, i dont forward cos i takut im spreading the wrong things n stuffs. heres an email i found in my inbox. if theres any doubt abt it, pls do leave some comments and enlighten us =)

Listed below are the 7 Common mistakes usually we make in prayers

Mistake 1: Reciting Surat al-Fatiha fast without pausing after each verse. The Prophet (SAW) used to pause after each verse of this surah. (Abu Dawood)

Mistake 2: Sticking the arms to the sides of the body, in rukoo' or sujood, and sticking the belly to the thighs in sujood. The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said: "Let not one of you support himself on his forearms (in sujood) like the dog. Let him rest on his palms and keep his elbows away from his body." (Sahih Muslim). The Messenger of Allah (SAW) used to keep his arms away from his body during rukoo' and sujood that the whiteness of his armpits could be seen (Sahih Muslim).

Mistake 3: Gazing upward during prayer. This may cause loss of concentration. We are commanded to lower our gaze, and look at the point at which the head rests during sujood. The Prophet (SAW) warned: "Let those who raise their gaze up during prayer stop doing so, or else their sights would not return to them i.e. lose their eyesight]." (Muslim)

Mistake 4: Resting only the tip of the head on the floor during sujood. The Prophet (SAW) said: "I am commanded to prostrate on seven bones the forehead and the nose, the two hands [palms], the two knees, and the two feet." (Sahih Muslim) Applying the above command necessitates resting the forehead and the nose on the ground during sujood.

Mistake 5: Hasty performance of prayer which does not allow repose and calmness in rukoo' or sujood. The Messenger of Allah (SAW) saw a man who did not complete his rukoo' [bowing], and made a very short sujood [prostration] ; he (SAW) said: "If this man dies while praying in this manner, he would die upholding a religion other than the religion of Muhammad." Abu Hurairah (RA) said: "My beloved friend, Muhammad (SAW) forbade me to perform postures of prayer copying the picking of a rooster; (signifying fast performance of prayer), moving eyes around like a fox and the sitting like monkeys (i.e. to sit on thighs)." (Imam Ahmad & at-Tayalisi) The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said: "The worst thief is the one who steals from his own prayer." People asked, 'Messenger of Allah! How could one steal from his own prayer?' He (SAW) said: "By not completing its rukoo' and sujood." (At Tabarani & al-Hakim). To complete rukoo' is to stay in that posture long enough to recite 'Subhana rabbiyal Adtheem' three times, SLOWLY, and 'Subhana rabbiyal-a'ala' three times, SLOWLY, in sujood. He (SAW) also announced: "He who does not complete his rukoo' and sujood, his prayer is void." (Abu Dawood & others)

Mistake 6: Counting tasbeeh with the left hand The Prophet (SAW) used to count tasbeeh on the fingers of his right hand after salah. Ibn Qudamah (RA) said: "The Messenger of Allah (SAW) used his right hand for tasbeeh." (Abu Dawood). The above hadeeth indicates clearly that the Prophet (SAW) used only one hand for counting tasbeeh. No Muslim with sound mind would imagine that the Prophet (SAW) used his left hand for counting tasbeeh. Aishah (RA) said that the Prophet (SAW) used his left hand only for Istinjaa', or cleaning himself after responding to the call of nature. He never used it for tasbeeh. Yasirah (RA) reported: The Prophet (SAW) commanded women to count tasbeeh on their fingers. The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said: "They (the fingers) will be made to speak, and will be questioned (on the Day of Resurrection)" (At-Tirmidhi). The above Hadeeth indicates that it is preferable to count tasbeeh on the fingers of the right hand than to do so on masbahah (rosary).

Mistake 7: Crossing in front of a praying person. The Messenger of Allah (SAW) warned: "Were the one who crosses in front of a praying person to know the consequences of doing so, he would have waited for *forty better than to cross in front of him." (Sahih Bukhari and Muslim). *The forty in the tradition may be days months or even years. Allah knows best.

last saturday.

Assalamualaikum. last last saturday, i "went" to an open house. (i did go kan, raccoon eyes??? ;p) and it was packed. like packedpacked. there was only a few times i saw some tables empty but not for long. but Alhamdulilah it seemed to have went well. n-bun was dancin and we had loads of fun tht night =)

anyway. few days ago i told n-bun she was going to school and that i told her to dress-up for school on her own in hopes that she'll be more enthusaiastic and hopefully she'll look forward to school. and she ended up wearing a pink shirt, long pink pants, with a blue skirt, and a summer hat. ahaha, i dunno what she thinks of school. lol.

anyhoo. school has been much more stable now. yay. like, busy busy jua but at least we werent as lost as we were in the beginning of the semester. thank God for tht. what have i been doing ah? ive been reading more Archie lately, since i have the time, and it helps me focus, for some reason.

oh and ive also been fasting, im trying to do at least six days, since it is still bulan Syawal. just trying to "accumulate points" and trying to impress the One up there.. after all, isnt He who made us?.. mudah-mudahan all our amalan and ibadah diterimaNya. Amin.

my sis has been helpin me out with my stats. shes trying to teach me to "get it" but i just dont"get it", get it? like advanced stats is almost nothin like the stats ive learned duluu when i was younger. well the basic stuffs ada plang but hhmph.

anyhoo. ive a presentation tomorrow. its abt problems encountered in teaching/ learning maths. wish me luck :)

i finally have time to play squash again. after like... what 4 months? boooo. squash de-stresses me. like i feel my stress draining out of me and like last month ive been sickly and asthmatic so yeah. but when youre stable, sports is actually good for your asthma. so im gonna go play at a cousins house nearby ard 3.30. i puasa plang, so shhhh dont tell Mummy =p

btw, i just wana thank all those ppl whos still here for me. who understand my situations despite me being busy hectic. those who cheer me up in the weirdest moments and those who help by just being there. i wish i wasnt this busy with school n whatnot. i hope i'll have more time in the afternoons soon. muxch love.thank you, you you you. and you,. and you jua lah. :)

dear daughter.

Dear daughter,
I’m sorry abt how I’ve been so busy with work this semester. I know you’re longing for some fun time together but it seems that work and other duties have taken over much to my despair. By nightfall, watching you sleep and smelling you are the only things I can do. I do wish I could wake u up and play, play, play! But I guess maternal instinct for your health keeps me from doing tht.
I don’t expect a three year old to understand but I wish I had a way to let you know how your love and your dad’s keep me going. Next semester will be better, once I’m used to the transition.

Hold on, n-bun. we're doing this for you. We love you and you are our strength. cant wait for holidayyyyyyy.

Muxch love,
Mummy.

I’m sure most working moms share this with me. Or schooling mom, hehe. We can only do so much but at the end of the day, we gotta stay strong. Honestly, I’ve never had too much of a struggle in UBD before this. But somehow I’m relieved that all of my classmates are struggling too. I guess it’s the semester timing. we already missed three beginning weeks of the semester, due to our articulation from diploma to degree. And that wasn’t even our fault—our offer letter came three weeks late.

And on top of that, assignments were due either towards the end of Ramadhan OR right after the fourth day of Raya. BOOOOO. And I was sick during raya. I went to the hospital for that. Arh emergency lagi tu, I refused the wheelchair, ahaha maluuuu.

It’s okay. Next semester will be better. InsyaAllah. Pray for me, yea? :) Amin.

quiet friday.

i spent most of the time working, whining and eating chocs. and im not even a big fan of patchi. but i guess the stress level have been hitting the ceiling lately :s
at least ive done some substantial work today and tht made me feel better..
anyway. tonight i had sometime to go off to an open house. its like my, what, third??? school has been tough on me this semester. hopefully Eid next year will be less clashy with the due dates of my major assignments.

i went with my lil family :) and my parents. the food was yummy. i felt tht raya-rush? hehe. so at least i know its still there despite being realy busy with work. anyway, lately ive been a bit worried cos my lil girl, n-bun, is really shy n sendin her to school next year got me thinkin if shes ready. shes two plus now, three in a few mths. but tadi i saw her trying to make frens n i found it real cute cos it was not like her to initiate a friendship cos shes real shy to if theres ppl, so i guess tht gave me the assurance to send her to school by next yr.. =)



hehe payah jadi parent and trying to be a good student ani.. wonder how ppl do it. im almost always tired. maths lagi bnyk krajaaaa ahhh. ;p im so happy to be surviving. anyhoo. im done printing. hope this assignnment is worth my sleepless nights Amin Amin!! :)

my day.

i finally went to checkout another school as in like, nursery? for my daughter.. and today, out of the many schools i went, i do like the schedule they have for the kids and i found it relatively good in terms of routines, discipline. and of course, the greatest bit is that it's got a balance of education and fun. the best part is, its near my mom's house. yay! :)
before tht i had french fries from mcDs.. FOR BREAKFAST. lol. gah! im so gaining. huhuhuhu. i just hope my sugar level is okay, even though i took like, plenty of chocs before i slept!! like right before i slept, boo me. gotta discipline myself. (but i better eat them before theyre declared banned like snickers and m&ms kan kan kan ;p